Picture this: You’re at work. A colleague from another office arrives. You haven’t seen her in a while. She was quite slim last time you met, but seems to have gained a few kilos. Actually… now that you look at her closely… is that a BUMP under her dress?! Oh boy! She might be PREGNANT! … More No, not pregnant, but thanks for asking! (Said no woman ever).
The proprietors of Chatz cafe in Gympie have defended themselves against the ‘cruel’ backlash they’ve received since their long-standing policy regarding ‘modest’ breastfeeding made the news last week. ‘It’s simple’, stated proprietor Yuan Miller, who is also the Pastor of the adjoining Victory Church. ‘We never said we were banning breastfeeding. Even WE know that would be … More Breastfeeding Welcome Here (as long as we don’t have to SEE it, ick!)
What’s this, you say? You barely hear from me for months, and suddenly I’m back with two posts in the same week? Yep. I’m the same with phone calls, so don’t feel like it’s just you guys. Today, we celebrate the season with some fine artworks by my two genii. 1. Picasso-Santa: The first is … More The crayon is mightier than the sword: Christmas 2015 edition!
The best part about being a modern parent with Internet access is how you learn from the mistakes of others, so you can do a better job of raising your children than they have. Just kidding! You only learn from your own mistakes, because you simply won’t credit other parents’ stupidity when they demonstrate ahead of … More Pro Tips for Rookie Parents (Or, How Not To Mess It Up The Way I Did)
Grocery day. The lowlight of my week, every Tuesday it shows up unannounced yet again. This particular Tuesday, I have been procrastinating running errands all morning, so it’s nearly lunchtime by the time Baby Girl and I even make it to the shops. We exit the car, I perch her securely on my back in … More That time I tried (and failed) to ‘grab a coffee’ like a normal person.
Those who already follow this blog will remember that on my return to paid employment after maternity leave, I splurged on a totally awesome automated vacuum cleaner, aka The Robot Slave. The longer I’ve owned this fine piece of machinery, the more similarities I’m seeing between it and my two-year-old daughter. For example: 1. It … More Six ways my robovac is exactly like my toddler.
Big week this week at Mummy Spits the Dummy! First, I’m over on one of my favourite sites Sammiches and Psych Meds with my piece Hungover With Kids (or Please Please Just Kill Me Now) – this is a very exciting development for me, because if the piece gets enough views over the next month I could stand … More Hooray again!
Well, it’s happening! Callooh, callay – my second and final baby is learning how to use the toilet. We’re finally going to be out of nappies FOREVER! Welcome to Dry Big-Girl-Pants Town, population us. Huzzah! Let us proceed to donate all the unused nappies, to dismantle and burn the change table, and to buy huge … More Toilet (training) humour.
Now, I’m modest, but I’ll say this. My prowess in the kitchen is nothing short of spectacular. Spectacularly awful, I mean. Betty Crocker I am not. Anyone who has been my friend in real life, or on my now-defunct Facebook account, will have seen ample evidence of my culinary failings. It was clear even in … More Baking atrocities: a retrospective.
As the person responsible for cleaning your bathroom, I detect a whiff of hypocrisy, son…